“Chance, when I saw you driving under the window with your head held high, with that terrible stiff-necked pride of the defeated which I know so well; I knew that your comeback had been a failure like mine.”

Alexandra Del Lago in Tennesse William’s “Sweet Bird of Youth”.

***

Pride plays a primary role in life.

Actions of massive import – wars, economic expansion, stock markets – are often revolving around an individual’s need to “save face” or “teach him a lesson.” 

Pride is ego’s attempt to defend a lie.

Posturally, pride is about stiffening, as Tennesse’s dialogue above illustrates.

Pride motivates you trying to “hold a position” – to show you really are the person you believe your Self to be. Your effort slowly becomes a stigma of inauthenticity.

I did not escape pride in this era of my life…

I was offered only a little teaching work at SATA - to be disregarded as a teacher for the school I helped create was a huge dent to my pride. The school trainees came to my defence, expressed their outrage, and helped reinstate me in a new position as the “anchor” of the school. Now I was going to be teaching all year consistently because the “Directors of Training” came from overseas and usually only on a three months business visa. I got my job back; pride seem to win.

But my heart was broken, and I gave up inside.

Instead, I threw myself into science studies. I went back to high school and studied Biology, Mathematics and Science, and after a year, I was admitted to the University of NSW to start my Bachelor of Science degree

But then another woman entered my life – and this one was already more than a half-century older than me! 

I was about to experience a violent reawakening of Alexander’s Discovery…

You can see how much of my story fits a developmental model of change, based on FM’s experience. I have made a series of video mapping these stories on the compass, and for a while, I am offering access to these at a 70% discount. You have read more and purchase at this link:

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